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Charlotte Bobcats vs Miami Heat, Game 1 diss rap

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Steve Mitchell-USA TODAY Sports

Dac

Bobcats at the seven, experts please repeat what you said?
Al Jefferson's got too much money? He's elite, you're dead
Like fitted caps, you've got the Heat to your head
No shots fired, we'll just beat you instead

Bosh is not nice, he plays like he's Posh Spice
in three games you will rot twice
LeBron's shot is nonexistent like hot ice
advice: call the cops thrice
it's assault when we rock mics

Penetrate, kick it out, destroy all your defenses
You'll score less points than your entire crowd attendance

You can have one game if you ask nicely for us to lend it
Bobcats in 5, we'll be sure to bury your remnants

Ben

You gotta beat the King if you wanna be the king
So we'll bring it to the ring and you best not blink
The slightest hesitation, get killed by the retro sting
jackin fools up on electrifying espresso bean screens
Grind you up like a slab of arabica, drinking to Lakshmi Singh
It's 4/20 and Beas is appalled by how his fingers fing

Bosh is ill too, after gettin' spun by Al's fakes until he's too sick
Ruthless slew'a picks while we hit em with the broomstick

Everyone's an attacker and the court's a stage
But how's LeBron heavier than a truck yet lighter than The Fray
In male pattern baldness, he's a poor man's Nic Cage
And did you know Birdman loves inside trading on the Nikkei?
It's the SEO age, you gotta lie for your wage
I'll put "LeBron retiring" in the URL for my pageview gauge

No shame in my game, I'm here to joke and watch ball
After the Bobcats win in 4, the Big Three can be called the Legends of the Fall